Myth: "Saving money or trying to build wealth is selfish and greedy"

Facts:

• 'Saving money means I'm taking care of myself, now and when I'm older.'

• 'Saving money for things like car repairs means that I'm being responsible and avoiding anxiety in the future when those repairs come up.'

• 'Saving money for my future self means I will be calmer, more confident, and therefore a better friend, daughter/son, partner, and parent in the future.'
  
  
  How does working on these beliefs affect us?
  
  It's so common for us to have beliefs about what it means to spend and save money that dictate our financial future. One way to break free of them is to start noticing all the times and places they show up for us, and deciding if we want to listen to them or not.
  
  Do you have any negative associations with saving money or building wealth? If so, what comes up for you?
  
  I realize I've purposefully avoided using the word 'wealth' in my business and marketing because I don't want to turn people off who may be uncertain if the word even applies to them, or if they could ever get from where they are today to being someone who is 'wealthy.' First of all, I view wealth as a very holistic concept and definitely NOT just based on your net worth number (your assets minus your debts).
  
  Secondly, perhaps I should start to use it more for this very reason - because I love helping people realize that they, too, can save more money, eventually retire, and live a life now that also makes them feel wealthy.
  
  For years I had subconscious fears about what would happen to certain relationships in my life if I were to become 'financially successful.' I wanted those people to be able to relate to me, and they often struggled with money. What if I didn't? I started to realize how much negative messaging I had internalized growing up- that people 'with money,' whatever that meant, must be either spoiled, or greedy, or superficial- that they didn't have to work hard, that it must have been handed to them somehow. It wasn't until I was older that I realized working super hard isn't the most noble and awesome thing ever. Isn't the world a better place if we aren't all burnt out?
  
  This week I was reading The Millionaire Next Door, where the author points out that over 80% of millionaires in America were not handed any of their wealth. On the contrary, they were mostly self-employed people who lived modestly and simply saved a decent amount, consistently, over time.
  
  Was what I was subconsciously taught about people with significant savings true? Definitely not.
  
  Not only that, but I realized that I was carrying a lot of shame about being a good steward of my money. I was so embarrassed and uncomfortable about being able to buy a rental house six years ago that I didn't even tell my closest friends or family until closing- I was afraid that, instead of celebrating my hard work- what if they were judgmental? Assumed I was suddenly 'one of them,' whatever that means, or just un-relate-able?
  
  :) I know. It all sounds silly now, but it was very real for me then.
  
  What influences the way you save your own money? Are there conditioned beliefs you have that prevent you from saving for your future self?
  
  
  Savings = What You Don't Spend
  On the flip side, are there beliefs you carry with you that influence how you spend your money?
  
  For example, it's common for those with a scarcity mindset to spend all of their money as soon as they receive it, for fear that they won't receive enough in the future. It's a 'spend it while I have it' mentality.
  
  
  Savings and spending are inversely related
  We can't improve our relationship with one side without addressing the other.

What's the worst thing that could happen?

So now I invite you to list out some of the beliefs you may be holding when it comes to spending or saving your money.

What's the worst thing that could possibly happen if you were to save more money or build wealth? Would you need to spend less on anything? What would happen if you did that?

Now, what if those things were to actually happen. Would you be OK? Most likely.

It's true. People may judge you, but it won't be because you're suddenly a bad person- it will most likely be because of their own stuff. I had a renter once write 'Jeff Bezos' on the subject line of their rent check to me, assuming that because I'd invested in a property, I must be 'the man,' and equivalent to one of the wealthiest people on this planet. Did they know that I saved for my first house while living on $2,000/month as a massage therapist? No, they did not. And that's OK.

I hope something in this newsletter/rant was helpful to you, even if indirectly:)

P. S. Want some food for thought about what you might want to save money for?

• Check out this awesome podcast with the author of Die With Nothing- Getting All You Can From Your Money and Your Life.