The hardest thing about being mindful with money
Even financial coaches do silly things with money.
Logic and reason are usually not the driving forces behind our financial decision making.
Our brains get hardwired to do life (and money) a certain way, and those habits take effort to break. We need to continuously stay alert in order not to slump back into our typical behaviors.
I know some of you may be coming from a place where you feel you are spending more than you'd like, and it takes effort to change the ingrained habits that result in that.
Personally I struggle with spending money on things that make ABSOLUTE SENSE, that I can TOTALLY afford... but I'm just not used to doing it. It's something I'm working on this year.
Here is a good example:
Last week I went to Mexico with my family. I didn't have a hard time paying for the trip or dropping the money on tickets and lodging.
However, there I was in the airport with two crying, over-tired four year olds, winding our way toward customs, when I saw it- The Smart Cart station.
We had traveled recently, and luckily there was a free cart just hanging around during that trip that allowed us to zip to our gate without my kids complaining about walking too much OR my back hurting from carrying our luggage (all carry-on, of course, which is more for convenience than cost).
I remember even making a mental note that paying for a luggage cart made an insane amount of sense when traveling with children.
And, there I was in Houston, seeing the kiosk- and I couldn't bring myself to do it. I spent thousands of dollars on a week-long vacation, but I didn't want to spend the $7 it would have taken to make that 20 minutes of our lives far less stressful.
I tell my clients all the time that financial coaching is shame-free zone, and it is. Even with myself, I had to realize afterward that it was just too hard for me in the moment to prioritize the convenience- I wasn't used to it! In hindsight, that luggage cart was invaluable! And, I knew there was about $850 in our budget that we weren't going to spend in January on groceries, gas, etc., because we were on that trip. It didn't make sense.
And on a similar note, that night I ate a snickers bar for dinner. Yup- not something I normally do. It was in my bag because it was a free 'hotel snack,' and I'm used to making do with what I have. Why didn't I go buy a healthy meal? Because it takes more mental work for me to spend money on eating out or convenience food, since I work from home and get to cook most meals for myself.
I'm learning to value convenience more as a parent, and I 100% value my health above most things... yet I know how hard it can be to put our money where our mouth is.
This year I'm working on refining my budget to represent the values of my current, 40-year-old-parent self:
Health
Connection/Community
Creativity
Being grounded, so that I can have a calm nervous system and self-regulate well for my kids.
Freedom & Flexibility (which ties heavily into financial security for me)
I'm so different than I was ten years ago, and I no longer feel a scarcity mindset around money.
However, if I didn't think about it enough, I would keep spending the way I always have.
Here are some examples of ways I'm relating these values to my spending:
I'm practicing going out for coffee just because it makes me happy, and because it's nice to see neighbors -- even when I have coffee at home.
I'm budgeting for more short trips with my family, even if it means paying more for lodging than I'm used to.
I might start investing less, because I feel safe about my financial future and want to make sure I'm enjoying life now as well, while I'm young and healthy. (The inspiration here comes from Die with Zero, which I recommend for any super savers out there).
I really want to visit one of my closest friends in Portugal this year, and because of that I nearly didn't sign up for an incredibly impactful business retreat that I went on last year. Again, I have to remind myself that I can probably budget for both!
Lastly, the luggage cart example! Prioritizing convenience for me really comes down to my value of staying grounded around my kids. If paying for something will decrease the likelihood of meltdowns (either parent or kiddo ones:), I'm going to seriously consider it.
Even if these examples don't resonate with you, we can all relate to how much intention it takes to spend money based on our values.
And, I think we can all benefit from trying on the idea that money can be fun.
I learn SO MUCH from my clients about how to infuse enjoyment and pleasure into life in small or big ways with money. If there's anything you'd like to share about what spending you do that gives you the most ROI on enjoyment, I'd love to hear about it. 😊
Thanks for reading, -Emily